In an ancient Greek myth, Paris – a Trojan prince – must choose the fairest among three goddesses: Aphrodite (love), Athena (wisdom/strategy), and Hera (power/kingship). Each offers a bribe, and Aphrodite promises Helen of Sparta, the most beautiful woman alive. Paris...

I’m driving through Italy right now—somewhere between Rome and the Ligurian coast. An hour ago, I picked a random lunch spot on Google Maps. Never been and barely checked it. But the moment it was in the GPS, I felt secure. I had a destination. A plan. That’s when I...

A little strategy goes a long way when giving a talk or speech. Last month, a CEO that I coach was prepping for an event with 1000+ investors. Of course, he told me last minute. I had no time to revamp his speech, but I did give him these 4 tips to elevate the talk:...

We love to throw the word “independence” around—especially in America. It’s practically our national brand. But look a little closer…because most people aren’t actually independent. Not even close. Sure, you may be financially independent. You pay your bills, own a...

There’s a first time for everything. First kid. First closed deal. First million. But we forget: there’s also a last time for everything. The last time you walk your dog. The last time you have dinner with a parent. The last time your kid asks you to play outside....

For an investor, there's nothing worse than being "dumb money." Smart investors sell down positions when their thesis is proven wrong. But do we ‘sell down’ investments in our personal lives? No, because that's when even the best decision-makers get irrational. Ever...

Your legacy transcends your lineage. Abraham Lincoln's son, Robert, attended Harvard and became a successful lawyer, yet he remains a minor footnote in Lincoln's biography. Why? Because Lincoln's legacy wasn't his lineage - it was saving the Union, abolishing slavery,...

Picture this: a former private equity partner on a cross-country flight reading a book called "Real Love." A cringeworthy title, indeed. But Sharon Salzberg has real wisdom: "Feeling incomplete inside ourselves, we search for others to complete us. But... we can't...

Picture this: a former private equity partner on a cross-country flight reading a book called "Real Love." A cringeworthy title, indeed. But Sharon Salzberg has real wisdom: "Feeling incomplete inside ourselves, we search for others to complete us. But... we can't...

Your Prime is Ending – Will You Fight Back? In 1998 at Lazard, I was a solid analyst but not a financial wizard. Some guys were absolute ninjas. Their models sang and their balance sheets balanced. By comparison, my future seemed limited. I was in my prime...

Last month at an event in Newport Beach, I gave a keynote to the usual crowd of software CEOs and investors. But one founder really stood out. A 64-year-old Mexican-American entrepreneur, without funding or formal education, had built a large Hispanic grocery chain...

What Decision don’t you See? When I got divorced 20+ years ago, the hardest part wasn't ending my marriage. While that was emotionally awful, the hardest part was seeing that divorce was an option at all! It was an Unseen Option. [spoiler: the pic of Ace of Base below...

"I'm past my prime." Four words that echo through midtown offices, locker rooms, and quiet moments of self-reflection. It's a phrase loaded with resignation, as if acknowledging the end of our best years. Society has sold us a simple but devastating story: that life...

We recently gathered eight men at Akera in Upstate New York for Valhalla Ascend VI, my 2-day retreat geared for those seeking to expand beyond typical societal rules and expectations. We traded the usual conference BS for something different: 2-hour forest hikes...

In 2018, I made my last pilgrimage to dusty Black Rock City for Burning Man. But was this desert utopia for real, or merely a mirage? Burning Man aspires to create a 'barter' economy where good deeds return tenfold and 'playa magic' reigns. While immersed, this...

We often pride ourselves on being independent thinkers, but is that really true? Do our careers vastly differ from those of our college peers? Or, do we mostly seek comfort within social norms, even down to our attire? I often fall into this pattern as well, although...

Why did you work so hard to be successful? Was it for financial security, to buy cool things, or to earn the respect of your peers? I know one thing you wanted… Control of your time. When we were young, our parents and teachers told us where to be and what to do. That...

Does it feel like life is passing you by? When I was grinding in private equity, I was constantly consumed by the “next” deal. But after the deal closed, I started looking for that “next'“ deal, again. Sound familiar? If you’re a ‘type A’ achiever, you’re probably...

During Valhalla Ascend retreats at my home in Park City, unexplained things often happen. I’ll share those details later. However, I struggled to find an East Coast property that could seamlessly merge mystical vibes, epic nature and 5-star private chef dinners. Until...

Did you have a lot to prove? Growing up, I felt a lot of pressure. Whether my parents' expectations or self-created, I was (maniacally) driven to compete and win. Sound like anyone you know? When I finally made it, the unrelenting hunger for more subsided for a...

10+ years ago at a Tony Robbins event, I learned about the Emotional Home. We may have a nice house or car, but we actually spend all our lives in the Emotional Home created by our minds. Question: Does your Emotional Home need a renovation? For example, there are 3...

Gents – Graduating from Glenbrook North H.S. in '93 was no cakewalk. I cranked to notch the grades (and golf trophies) to get into Princeton. At Princeton, I cranked to get to Wall Street. At Lazard, I cranked to get a private equity job. As a PE analyst, I cranked to...

Can you believe Summer 2024 is here already? How are those 2024 goals looking—especially your health goals? I promised myself 50 yoga sessions in 2024, and here at week 22, I'm only at 14. That's an F, so I feel your pain if you're falling behind. Pre-Summer Health...

My peer group supported my success, wealth, and (sometimes conspicuous) consumption...but not my personal growth. I designed Valhalla Ascend to create a peer group of men who understand trophies are overrated and now seek to invest in themselves. Valhalla Ascend V...

Summer vacation often means splurges like a birthday bash in Mykonos or brunch parties in the Hamptons. But what really drives us to spend so much time and money escaping to these destinations? Many of us cite reasons such as "family time" or "a mental break." Yet,...

Gents – In August 2015, turning 40 meant an entire month of extravagance. First was Ibiza, where I navigated the island with an entourage and bodyguard. It ended in Stockholm with a two day birthday extravaganza, culminating with Ace of Base's surprise performance. It...

Could 5 minutes per day be worth $50K? During our last HBS mindset call, one classmate said his new morning routine increased his productivity by 30 minutes per day. He feels calmer, clearer and less distracted at work, which means getting home to his daughters...

Gents – While on the Princeton golf team, curating the perfect foursome was my secret weapon. Why? Because being surrounded by great golfers fast-tracked my growth as a player. You're likely a player in the business arena. You’ve got serious investors, CEOs, and...

HBS Mindset Team - Amazing call and turnout! Impressed that some of you stayed 30 extra minutes. Takeaways from the Zoom below: 1. 5-5-5- Morning routine is working for HBSers - people love cold showers(!) - people are feeling BOTH happier AND more productive - we...

Gents – I struggled with the questions in this video. If you are, too, there’s no better place to struggle than Lundy Farms, a 60-acre paradise nestled in 30,000 acres of forest, 2 hours from NYC. Just 1 minute; full screen and volume: The Question At Valhalla Ascend...

Gents – Don’t be the ‘old guy at the club.’ Here's the hard truth: If you're reading this, your fluid intelligence is fading, starting around 30, and you're set to decline professionally (per Harvard Prof. Arthur Brooks). The bright side? High achievers can transition...

At my 20th reunion from Harvard Business School, it was great to see that so many friends had done so well. Interestingly, many of those reaching notable financial heights had remained in the same industry, or even at the same company, for 10 or 20 years. This...